"Well, I did it, and there's an end of it!" she said to herself,
frowning, and striving to find some sort of grim satisfaction from this
hackneyed phrase. "What nonsense it all is! I wanted to do it and I did
it; and I felt so happy--oh, so happy! It would have been silly not to
enjoy myself when the moment came. I must not think of it; it can't be
helped, now."

She languidly withdrew from the window and began to undress, letting
her clothes slip from her on to the floor. "After all, one only lives
once," she thought, shivering at the touch of the cool night air on her
bare shoulders and arms. "What should I have gained by waiting till I
was lawfully married? And of what good would that have been to me? It's
all the same thing! What is there to worry about?"

All at once it seemed to her that in this hazard she had got all that
was best and most interesting; and that now, free as a bird an eventful
life of happiness and pleasure lay before her.

"I'll love if I will; if I don't, then I won't!" sang Lida softly to
herself, thinking meanwhile that her voice was a much better one than
Sina Karsavina's. "Oh! it's all nonsense! If I like, I'll give myself
to the devil!" Thus she made sudden answer to her thoughts, holding her
bare arms above her head so that her bosom shook.