Verge of the Precipice

I do not know how I got through with the business of that day. Even
in my weakness I was possessed of a singular degree of strength.
I saw Kingsley, Wharton, and all of the parties whom we met the
day before. We came to a final decision on the subject of Kingsley's
claims; I took down the heads of several papers which were to be
drawn up; the terms of sale and transfer, bounds and characteristics
of the land to be conveyed; and engaged in the discussion of the
various topics which were involved in these transactions, with as
keen a sense of business, I suspect, as any among them. The habit
of suppressing my feelings availed me sufficiently under the present
circumstances.

Kingsley said nothing on the subject of yesterday's
adventure, nor was I in the mood to refer to it. With some effort
I was cheerful; spoke freely of indifferent topics, and pleased
myself with the idea of my own firmness, while persuading my hearers
of my good humor and my legal ability. I do not deny that I paid
for these proofs of stoicism. Who does not? There is no such thing
as suppressing passions which are already in action--at least, there
is no such thing as suppressing them long. If the summer tempest
keeps off to-day it will come to-morrow, and its force and volume
is always in due proportion to the delay in its utterance. The
solitudes of the forest heard my groans and agonies when man did
not--and the venom which I kept from my lips, overflowed and poisoned
the very sources of life and happiness within my heart.