The Fungus Among Us

It was on a quiet morning in July when the article in the local paper about the alarming growth of the field grass fungus known as St. Anthony's Fire first caught her attention. Before that, Mary Rose McGee had only dreamed of killing her despicable landlord, Mr. Calhoun Lewis, because she had no idea how to go about such things. Hers was a carefully constructed life of loving care and church and only the most proper and noble causes. She was so absorbed in reading the article written by one of Connecticut's most prominent scientists that she completely lost track of time, which almost never happened to the prim and precise retired elementary school teacher.

The author had researched the disease thoroughly; tracing its origins as far back as the Middle Ages, when countless people died terrible deaths from eating breads made from these grasses and grains. The maturity of this fungus was greatly influenced by temperature changes and the prolonged heat of the summer was a cause for much alarm. The chief concern was that the fungus might get mixed up in animal food. For an animal lover such as Mary Rose, the thought of one of God's creatures dying by respiratory and heart failure and the horrible sensation of its skin being roasted alive was too much to bear. For Calhoun Lewis to meet his maker that way was another story.

Many people in her small town might have considered the murder of such a scoundrel a downright public service. They might have considered it and even going so far as to formulate a plan of action, but carrying out the dastardly deed was another matter. Not that there would have been very much to miss about the cigar smoking, loudmouthed Calhoun Lewis with his penchant for young girls, drunken brawls and unabashed publicity. The quiet little old lady who never smoked or cursed, and tended her garden with the same devotion that she baked pies and cookies for the church bazaars and the children on Halloween could not have been more opposite. And yet within that most upstanding and law abiding mind thoughts of murder brazenly pranced.